So, I saw New Moon last night with Friend Gretchen. She made the supreme sacrifice of seeing it again with me after she had already seen it on Friday night. She gives so much. Faithful Bubblegum readers may remember my scathing review of the Twilight movie when it came out last year. As a fan of the books, I hated the first movie. Low budget = crappy movie. Though, Twihards flocked in DROVES to the B- amateur flick.

I have to say, New Moon is head and shoulders (and entire torsos....but that comes later) above Twilight. Because I KNOW you are dying to hear my thoughts on the latest chapter of the Twilight Saga, here they are:

1. O. M. Freaking G. Taylor Lautner - Wowza! I was not super impressed with TL in the last flick. Something about his nose being too cute for the role. It wasn't believable. However, his performance in New Moon has completely changed my mind. I mean, what red blooded American female would not prefer TL's tanned, sculpted abs over Emo, Wimpy, Pale Vampboy? I kept trying to caress the screen in the theater. I mean, the scene in the RAIN!!!! THE RAIN! Friend Karly says she feels like a Dirty Old Woman bc she is half his age and was all about some TL (it makes my crush on JPW look normal). Cougar on Karl. Cougar On.

2. Jasper's Hair - Seriously? Seriously. WTF? Is the hairdresser for this movie TRYING to make him look like a french poodle? Its so wrong! Since Twilight, I have discovered that Jasper was on The O.C. (as was Rosalie). He played Kaitlin Cooper's sorta boyfriend or something. Anyhoo, he was pretty cute on The O.C. Mostly because he had a normal hair do. Still not a great actor, but I digress. Note to the Hairdresser on Eclipse: Please just give him normal hair. People actually laughed in my theater (Did I mention they screamed, gasped and woo-hooed for Jacob and his hot abs?).

3. Edward's lips are too pink.

4. Jessica - still my FAVORITE character (besides Abs Lautner). Her scene where she went to the movies with Bella was awesome. She was the most believable actor in the movie.

5. As I had heard from Karly the Cougar, this movie was way funnier. Good Call producers.

6. The part where Bella and Edward are running thru the forest when she is a vamp - Did they have to make it so ridiculous? He was wearing a vest? The running? Can't they just be acting normal? Who runs thru the forest wearing a vest and a flowing chiffon dress? Idiots.

7. The rain scene - There is this one scene where TL is shirtless in the rain. It is freaking amazing.

8. Dakota Fanning is a really good actress. She did so much in the one scene she was in. She is awesome.

9. This movie should be rated R - Not because of the abs (bc those were nice), but because Bella is a HORRIBLE role model for teenage girls. There is this one scene where Jacob is shirtless and Bella suggests they run away. He says, "You'd leave everything?" and she was all like, "Yes, I'd do it for you.". Granted, she was in the presence of the shirtless Jacob, however, that does not make it right. If my daughter did something like that, I'd slap her back to the 80's. NOTE TO TEENAGE GIRLS OUT THERE: Do not do anything just for some stupid guy!!!! These movies are NOT REAL LIFE!! Real teenage boys will screw you in the end. End of Public Service Announcement.

10. The kid who played Jacob has been at the gym a lot. And it has totally paid off. Chris Weitz knows his audience well and he showcased that sculpted torso to its fullest. Thank you Mr. Weitz. Good Job.

So, if any of you out there want to see it again and need a viewing companion, I will make the supreme sacrifice and go with you. I mean, I don't want to spoil it for you or anything, but there is this one scene, when Jacob is standing in the rain....